My entire life has been colored by a need for perfection. For years, I believed I could somehow please everyone. Slowly, I discovered that wasn't possible. I started living more from my heart and less from the need to be perfect and have my life look perfect. There is an eerie connection between perfection and control. I think Bree on Desperate Housewives exemplifies this. In order to have everything perfect, we must exert control over every aspect of our lives.
I found my first gray hair in my early twenties but until a couple of years ago have colored to keep them covered. Then I decided to go natural. It worked until I saw the pictures from my Mother's 70th birthday party. I panicked and colored again. That lasted about 6 months and then a couple of months ago I got tired of the fake color.
Our mind is an incredible tool. It has the capacity to learn and retain knowledge, to facilitate communication and to imagine amazing and wondrous things. It can also create chaos in our relationships, fill us with fear and anxiety and disrupt any possibility of peace in our lives. We can control our minds but few of us do or realize we can. Controlling the mind is the greatest discipline I have found. The first step is to decide what we want to change. If we are having thoughts that are creating fear or discomfort, we can decide we want to think of something else.
I have long denied my own inner wisdom when it comes to the people around me. I suspect it is related to some of the events in my early life where my boundaries were severely crossed. Whatever the reason, I spent many years attracting people into my life who crossed my boundaries, not so much physically, but mentally, spiritually and psychically.
I was reading through items on Craigslist last night and ran into a painting for sale by Dyrk Godby. That is a fairly unique name and I had to look it up because I went to high school with a Dyrk Godby. Turns out, it was the same guy. I remember him as a great boxer and knew that he had won a middleweight boxing championship. As I read about him, I learned of all the amazing things he has done in his life. He's been a champion rodeo man, a singer and songwriter and a talented painter.
We have recently started building an aquaponics system. There is nothing like a new project to start the mental juices flowing. We're learning about water quality, raising fish, maintaining nutrient levels for plants... you name it, the list goes on. Fortunately, we found a great resource in the aquaponics forum at Backyard Aquaponics. The people there are great at providing whatever knowledge they have.
I quit a job today. It wasn't your ordinary job. I actually worked for two different companies, one each owned by a father and son. One company I get paid for and the other is a startup. I finally reached the point I couldn't do it anymore. During the last year, I've compromised my values and given until I have nothing left to give. So, this morning, I quit.
Submitted by Amber
My life has been filled with so many changes lately. Some days I am totally in awe that I have come this far and that I have so much. I am growing up and finding who I am, this has been a long time coming.
I've chosen to get healthy this year along with the help of some family members. What I didn't expect was a new spurt of personal growth to go with it. Maybe its because we are relying on one another for motivation and strength to stick with getting healthy. Maybe its running this website and putting myself on the line. I'm not sure which. All I know is that I'm opening my eyes and seeing some things about myself I don't like. It's a painful process that I haven't gone through in a while.
Submitted by Tomplum
Apparently, perception is everything. No, scratch that. Apparently how we arrive at perception is really . . .. . . Maybe if you read on, I will have completed the sentence.
At the tip of a small internal struggle is how my perception of things motivate me. I say small struggle as I'm sure what I see above the surface is truly just the tip of the iceberg.