Wisdom

I Am Enough

It's been a year of learning and growing. Last year at Thanksgiving, my husband bought us 23andMe genetic tests. We sent them off with anticipation of perhaps learning more about my Dad. You see, he walked out of the picture when my mom got pregnant. They were in the Air Force and as the story goes, he didn't want to be a dad so he left.

Voices in My Head

Something has changed
somewhere I made a decision
not to listen to the voices in my head
to just move forward
let them clamor in the background
tell me what they'd like
I don't hear them anymore
Ironically what's left
is almost as unsettling
I'm wandering a bit
lost in a world of unknowns
feeling like I should be somewhere
with nowhere to go
I wish I could tell you what I did
to make the voices slip away
I have no idea
Maybe I realized they weren't real
they were figments of my 

Poetry
Wild Heart
Wisdom

What Are You Nostalic For

Jason and statue

What am I nostalgic for?
simpler times
grace in movement
a strong, healthy body
a beautiful voice
singing my heart out
my son's laughter
family together at the holidays
my mom busy in her garden
buying plants together
these are all things
that slip away with age
one has to find grace 
in wisdom and understanding
one has to work harder
for a strong body
understand its limits
the voice falters
songs are no longer sung
people pass on
either through illness

Poetry
Wild Heart
Wisdom

Stillness

Stillness at Sunset

I feel this desire for stillness today. I had difficulty sitting in meditation and yet here I am at the computer and can almost slip off into that quiet meditative state. How does one find stillness in a life-filled day? Moments. That's my only answer. 

I think of the places in my life I have found stillness or quiet when I most needed it. When I worked for a large credit union, I would take my break outside, walking around the building. It was a few moments of solitude in a long busy day. 

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