Poetry

Spring's Urging

I'm trying to move,
sadness continues to be
my constant companion.
My mind is a constant swirl.
I can feel the stirring of spring.
I can feel the pressure
of tasks long left undone.
I no longer want to just curl up
in front of the fire,
or stay in my cave
and ignore the rest of the world.
But I also don't seem to have
any forward moving energy.
So, I'm just letting it be,
finding one thing
that calls me in the moment.
Baby steps, I believe they call it,
steps into the now.

An evening of remembrance

An evening of remembrance -
stories shared
with a best friend,
another one who adored him.
Once again
I'm back to the why.
I reach this place of acceptance,
of letting go and moving on.
Then something happens
to bring back the senselessness
of the whole affair.
That darkness he hid so well,
the one that ate him
from the inside out,
the one we caught glimpses of
over the years
as he battled with the monster
known as depression.
How can someone so good,
so loving and giving

It's the end

It's the end
the story is over.
There will be no more worry.
There will be no more angst.
I'm sorry you couldn't find another way.
I'm sorry life got so hard.
I'm sorry you couldn't see beyond tomorrow.
I'm sorry to let you go.
I'll miss your sense of humor.
I'll miss your amazing photos.
I'll miss watching you finish our garden path.
I'll miss your playful spirit.
I'll miss your tender soul.
I'll miss my son.
I'm proud to have been your Mom.
I'm proud of the man you were.

Moments to hold onto

The song playing
the one I used to hear
when the stress was at
the max
and it helped me
remember to
Breathe

Sudden sound
something flashing
at the edge of vision
then climbing high
into the sky
suspended for a moment
then diving down
a hummingbird
a pair of hummingbirds
at play

The brightness
of a flower
just before dusk
somehow seems
to glow
and say, "I'm here"
in the fading light

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